Why I Took a Career Break & How I Spent It

Issue 004

❁˖⁺‧₊ HAPPY FRIDAY ₊‧⁺˖❁

Welcome to The Contrarian. In my last analysis, To Hack Growth, Hack Company Culture, I analyzed the relationship between employee well-being and company performance. Today, we are getting personal and talking about the break I took from my career. Find me on Instagram and LinkedIn. I will also be posting a waitlist for a new venture I’m starting next week, so stay tuned :)

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This is one of the topics I’m most insecure about talking about, but I figured I have this platform… why not be honest?

The story starts when I was 27 years old and living in Philadelphia, PA. I made a timeline of my life from birth to 27, and filled the page in with the most monumental and significant moments of my life. I remember looking at the page in front of me, I felt so… empty. Like I wasn’t actually living the life I would tell stories about when I’m older. It almost felt like I was going through the motions, and I didn’t really have “depth” to who I was or what I was doing.

Up until that point, I had a good career, I was traveling to different states and countries often, and most of all, I had safety. But there was something missing. The best way to describe it was that I was just doing what everyone else was doing because I thought that’s what I was supposed to do. On top of that, I wanted to make my parents proud, so I tried to seek out what I thought they would be proud of.

And I know this is going to sound cliché, but the more I tried to fit in and be like everyone else, the less I knew who I was. But not in a people pleasing type of way… I don’t know if I would consider myself as a people pleaser? I guess the best way to describe it was that I would hide any and all parts of myself just to feel a sliver of acceptance.

Then something personal happened where my entire outlook changed. Actually, there were two major events that occurred in my life within the span of a week. And one of those events pushed me over the edge. That’s something I’ll have to share when the time is right… if it’s ever appropriate. But the second thing that happened was that I was laid off from my job. My job was kind enough to offer me another role within the company, but I declined it. I decided to leave altogether.

And that’s when my journey began, something new to add to my timeline. I call it my awakening now. Not from the corporate world, but from my own world. I decided to focus on ‘who I am’ instead of ‘what I am’. Because so much of my life was centered around ‘labels’ and this idea of ‘what will people think?’. That in someway if I don’t have something to show for my life it would be completely worthless. So, I got rid of everything. I said goodbye to my apartment, my career, my old life. I literally got rid of my entire identity. And the journey has been… tough. It’s broken me several times and humbled me in more ways than I can count. But I can at least say that I’m on a new path, I’m on a journey, it’s more than I could have said for myself before. I’m proud of myself for making mistakes, trying new things, and building identity capital.

Alright, so how did I spend my career break?

When it first happened, I felt like this was my moment to be free and explore. I decided to take random classes and learn things I was always curious about. I learned how to day trade, traveled to India twice to visit my grandmother (that’s more than I’ve seen her in the last 8 years prior), started the prototypes for my own clothing line, took career and educational courses, and joined the Board of Directors for a non-profit as their Fundraising and Partnerships chair. I also interviewed with companies and talked to people from all different types of industries. It was fun and confusing and scary and weird and a little dystopian at times. But it was growth, it was different.

One of the most rewarding experiences was my time volunteering at my local library. I worked with kids in middle school and helped them with their homework twice per week. That experience was definitely humbling because I never worked with kids before, and I don’t think I did a proper math problem in over 10 years. Not only did I re-learn so much (I was literally watching YT videos trying to learn so I could be useful) but they taught me sooo much about life, connection, and heart. They are so bright and so smart (if you’re reading this… Julia, Ja’Lyah, Jada, Zaier, Sariyah, Lorenzo you guys are the best and never forget how capable you are!!!).

One of the most crucial things I learned was getting my self worth back. In a weird way, like a really weird way, I have so much more respect for myself today than I did when I decided to leave my job. The reason I say it’s weird is because I have so many less ‘material’ things. And I’m not by any means saying that everything is fixed. I just know what I want in my life more now, and no matter how afraid I am, I’m going to try to actually go after it.

Anyway, I’m going to end this with a few photos. It’s time to put an end to this chapter and time to start the next. I’m leaving it up to the universe. But whatever it is and whenever it comes I’m ready. ♥︎

As always, message me or leave me a comment below.

Sending you lots of love!!! ♡♡♡

XOXO,

Palak